Tuesday, August 29, 2006

This MUST Stop

I was going to post something about Ernesto heading my way, but there's another natural disaster brewing that takes top priority.



Oh hell no.

John, listen --
One upon a time Antonio Banderas was the hottest thing on the market. Then he diddled that nasty ol' blonde Melanie, and he sank faster than Brooklyn informant tied to a block of concrete.

John, her body is not a wonderland, it's a wasteland heavily guarded by rabid pitbulls due to high levels of toxicity.

This must not happen. Please don't make me bump you from my top three. Please step away from the trashy blonde. Run to the nearest clinic, get tested, and fax me the results. I'll be seeing you in concert in a few short weeks, and I really don't want to break out my birdflu mask yet.

This is Funky, and that is all.