Thursday, December 22, 2005

HNT -- Here's Looking at You, Kids.


SooooooooooooOSBASSO shook things up a bit this week, didn't he? Instead of our usual half-nekkid fodder, we are instructed by the bOSs to gift three fellow HNTers with something other than skin. Being the obedient little fuck that I am, I gift (in no particular order):

Robin a.k.a Binsk
Binsk, you're one of the first blogs I started reading when I started reading blogs. Because of your quirky sense of humor and your fantastic eye for photography (my GOD, I remember when you bought your camera), I gift you with a round-trip, all expenses paid trip to someplace warm. When you arrive, you're going to be happy to find out that of the four weeks you'll be staying there, you get to spend a week with a crack-photographer, going on one of those travelog photoshoots. Your pictures will, of course, be published in a very artsy magazine upon your return. The other three weeks will be spent in an all-inclusive, oh-so-exclusive resort, where you will be served cocktails by men without shirts. Oh yes, Honey -- I arranged with your boss for these four weeks to be time off with pay.

Roximoon over at Between a Rock and a Diamond
Roxi, I found you through HNT about a week or two before you were forced to take your blog down. I mourned! From the first time I read your blog I was hooked. You are forceful, sexy, and intelligent. You never cease to amaze me, how bold and unpredictable and confident you are. So to you, I gift a Mind Control Mirror. With this Mind Control Mirror, you will no longer have to worry if your boyfriend's parents really like you. You'll know it beyond a certainty. In addition, this Mind Control Mirror comes with a profanity filter, so you can say "fuck" all you want, without fear or trepidation.

Femi-Mommy at Random Thoughts and Confessions
Femi-Mommy, I also discovered you through HNT, and though I don't always get the chance to visit you daily (nor have I had the chance to visit you in your new digs), I always shoot straight over to your blog on Thursdays (well, actually Wednesday nights, truth be told). Your photography is more than that; it's art, and no, it's not bad art. Art should transcend the medium and evoke. Your portraits always do. You have set an example in that we never have to just point the camera at our collar bone and shoot -- we have the option of saying in print, "This is how I feel." So I gift you with good health for the rest of your days. Being in good health, you will have the stamina to take on the second prong of your gift. I have opened an art gallery in New York City, with an annex in LA and Miami. I'll be commissioning the work of both you and Freckle Boy, and all expenses of reproduction, travel, and accomodations have been taken care of. Your work will be heavily promoted, my muse, and I promise you two will have plenty of down-time to enjoy your penthouse apartments.

Here's looking at you, Kids. For your intellect, your confidence, and your passion, I wish you all the best of the holiday of your choosing.
This is Funky, and that is all.